Help Us Have the Baby We Dream About

I made a permanent decision for a life I thought would last forever.

For 11 years, I shared my life with my children’s father. We had four children together, and when we agreed our family was complete, I had my fallopian tubes removed. I believed we would spend our lives raising our children together. I never imagined I would lose him to suicide.

Years of planning could not prepare me for a future without him—or for the fact that I would eventually find love again and wish so deeply for another baby.

Today, I am married to a man who has no biological children, and we hope to have a baby together. I love my four children with everything in me. Wishing for another does not mean anything is missing from my love for them. It means there is another experience my husband and I long to share.

Sometimes I dream that, somehow, I am pregnant and finally holding our baby. Then I wake up, and I remember why it cannot happen the way I wish it could. If I could change one thing, it would be that decision—not my children, not the years I spent loving their father, just the choice I made without knowing what life would bring.

Our path forward is IVF, and the cost is the barrier we cannot overcome alone. I work while attending college, and we have saved $1,380 toward treatment. We are trying, but with bills and the needs of our family, we have not been able to save enough to move forward.

We are raising funds for fertility consultations, testing, IVF treatment, medications, egg retrieval, and embryo transfer, as recommended by our future fertility specialist. We have not started treatment yet, and we will share updates as we learn our exact costs and take each step.

It is difficult to make something this personal public and ask for help. But this hope matters enough to us to try.

If you can donate, thank you for helping us move closer to treatment. If you cannot, sharing our story or keeping us in your prayers would mean so much. We know IVF cannot promise us a baby. We are asking for help to have a chance.