Drew & Jessey's Dream Worth Fighting For
Organised by Jessey Idler · August 24, 2026
The world of infertility is vast, and we’ve certainly found ourselves tossed on its tempestuous sea. Drew and I have longed to become parents for so long and when we began our life together, we had no reason to think that our journey to parenthood would be different from anything we’d envisioned for ourselves: meet, fall in love, get married, start a family, and live a beautifully chaotic and peaceful, happy life. Simple, right? Until you get a double-whammy infertility diagnosis: azoospermia and low AMH. Naturally, when life throws a curveball, you pivot and redirect. An early diagnosis set us on our path quickly after we married and we threw ourselves into the realm of IVF. Drew underwent an aspiration procedure and fortunately, the doctor was able to extract a significant number of healthy swimmers. Resulting from what they withdrew from this procedure, we were now presented with 6 potential chances with IVF. Once we secured our financing, I dove into this needle phobia with as much positivity and determination as I could muster. Now, three rounds and one ectopic pregnancy later, it can be difficult to distinguish between hope and desperation. After taking time to process and heal after each failed round, we once again pivot and redirect. Three round and three egg retrievals with a relatively low yield have been taxing on the body, so the time is right to pursue other avenues. We’ve investigated embryo and egg donors and sought out as much information as we could for both routes while figuring out what we could realistically financially do. It’s hard to find a balance between what’s feasible and what would be overextending ourselves. While navigating our next path forward, our yearning was heard and an opportunity presented itself: a special price egg donor who exceeded our criteria. We’ve been able to scrape enough together to secure a full cohort of 6 eggs. Fertility coverage through insurance is now nearly depleted, leaving the next hurdle to be the remaining amount for the embryology lab and the frozen embryo transfer. We’ve fought too hard to get here and won’t give up on this dream. We continue to save what we can and shall keep applying for grants as they come available. If fortune sees fit, we also hope to secure 6 more eggs from the same donor if there are any remaining, but will then still need to cover embryology. Through the throes of infertility, we hold true to one another and take every opportunity to strengthen our bond and enjoy our time together. Drew makes sure I smile and laugh every day, a quality I admire and look forward to seeing in action for our children. We are keeping the faith that we will be parents, even if it looks different and takes a little longer than we had imagined. Thank you for taking the time to learn our story and adding wind to our sails. Jessey & Drew
Updates
October 23, 2026
Next Step!
With everything that's been donated and what we've been able to save, we've been able to pay our quote for embryology so we can hopefully have a transferrable embryo in December! Now that we've been able to make this payment, the clinic and embryology lab can arrange for the thaw of the stored sperm and the donor eggs. Then, through the ICSI process of IVF they will fertilize the donor eggs that survive the thaw. From there, we wait 5 days to see how many embryos make it. Any viable 5 day blastocysts will then be frozen and we will be able to coordinate with my December cycle. While we hope for multiple embryos, we will be incredibly lucky if we can get one. Because I always need to have a contingency plan, I'll still be prepared to apply for the grant due at the end of the year. We will know by that time one of three options: 1) Whether we have multiple embryos and don't need to apply; 2) we have one embryo and apply hoping for coverage for more donor eggs; or 3) we redirect and start again. We are incredibly grateful for everyone who has rallied behind us to help us keep hope alive. We wouldn't have this chance if it wasn't for you. We hope to have an update within the next couple of weeks!
September 5, 2026
Making Progress
Working our way through our checklist, we've gotten the green light from the genetic counselor who reviewed Drew's and the donor's genetic testing. There are no overlapping recessive genes! Now the Egg Bank is able to arrange for the donor eggs to be shipped to our preferred clinic for storage until we're able to move forward. We also had a required appointment with a Mental Health Professional for Intended Parents and received valuable resources for parents utilizing donor eggs, for donor-conceived children, and additional information for the post-partum stage. We're so grateful for the support that's been given so we can navigate this new path toward parenthood! We've submitted our application for the Gift of Parenthood grant which closes at the end of September. We should know by mid-October if we've been selected! We'll keep saving and fundraising in the hopes that whatever the grant outcome, we'll be able to move forward by the end of the year.